A Letter to fellow participants. My Personal Experience
The School of Shamanic Initiation
Fortunately though, my mother was so blown away by my experience that she says ayahusaca is calling out to her. She actually has a lot of emotional baggage from her childhood so I'm gonna be going with her for support, we'll be going to the June 11-13 ceremony. So for all of those who will be attending that ceremony, I can't wait to cross paths again. And I'm positive that after my mom tells others of her experience, I'll have other family members and friends that will ask me to help support them in their own journeys after June. So it's likely that I'll see some of you again sometime down the line. Cory, I couldn't agree more with the sentiment of your message. Yes, to all of the love and compliments that you shared with everyone, and to the changes within your own life that you've created. A thousand times yes! It just dawned on me that the traditional context of that phrase is usually when someone proposes to their fiance and their fiance agrees, but whatever: I'm happy to hear that you feel like your true self is finally able to express itself, we should all unapologetically by ourselves. Though we had two completely different experiences, I can relate to a lot of what you said about finding relief and peace within yourself.
I managed to shed myself of a lot of insecurities and fears that I had. In fact, I actually discovered that all the insecurities and fears that I had weren't mine, but rather fears and insecurities of others around me. I allowed them to release some of their burden onto me and I carried it around so long that I begun to think they were mine. Mother Ayahuasca helped show me this in the most beautiful and profound way imaginable. During one of my journeys, there was a moment where I was thrown back into my seven year old mind and body, alone in some kind of empty void. I remember feeling anxious, I felt like I needed guidance and protection, someone to help me out. As soon as I thought that, a figure appeared. A dark, shadowy presence looming over me. Although the figure was much taller than me and was made up of dark unrecognizable material, it wasn't scary. To the contrary, it actually felt peaceful and calmed my nerves. I walked right up to it and tilted my head back to look up at it. I felt enamored, I remember thinking that this figure embodies everything that I wanna be when I grow up. And as soon as I thought that, BOOM, my perspective changed instantaneously. I became the figure and I realized that the figure was me, the 25 year old man I am today! It was wild, to say the least. So it's really great to hear that you've come into yourself and feel comfortable in your own skin! I really like what you said about about time, time has become so much more valuable to me. When I'm enjoying something, I feel present and feel grateful for the moment. When I'm at work or doing something not very enjoyable, I remind myself that my life is still more comfortable than that of a king who lived 300 years ago. Air conditioning and fresh produce is something I'll remind myself to never take for granted. It truly was a blessing getting to spend time with y'all and have so many deep conversations. Feel free to reach out privately if you wish to connect on a personal level! I don't have facebook or any other social media but I'll hand out my phone number for anyone who asks. I wish the best for each of y'all! Take care everyone!
Alex